Is Being Authentic A Risk?

From Asheville to New York and L.A., so many conversations winging through the airwaves and crisscrossing social media; #beauthentic #beyou #being yourself #authenticyou. The hashtags hit us every time we scroll through an Instagram, FB or Twitter feed.

What happens when we really step into being our true, or authentic self?

Why is it something we want to do? The answer seems really obvious right? Being authentic means being who you truly are and bringing that to the table every time you show up for something. It means giving yourself permission to be the wacky, funny or reserved person you are deep down inside without worrying about what others will think of you.

people talking together, authentic

WHEN WE CHANGE HOW WE SHOW UP ON THE WORLD, EVERYTHING CHANGES AROUND US.

Everyone’s Talking About Being Authentic

Amidst all the talk about being authentic, there isn’t as much about how doing so will change your life in ways that you never guessed at. Some of them might seem exciting and wonderful, others are going to be challenging at first but if you learn to navigate the changes, you can learn to roll with them and create even deeper and more lasting relationships with other people and the world around you.

Part of what I love about being a life coach is that I get to help people step into their authenticity each and every day. Witnessing people learn to not “throw themselves under the bus” at a job or with a boss, and instead learning to offer a new solution or perspective that is in alignment with their core values, is one of the great payoffs of coaching. As my clients learn how to live in alignment with their core values, they give themselves permission to be who they really are, way deep down inside.

It’s a beautiful thing to see when someone makes the shift from acting the way they think they should, which creates all sorts of limits on how they are going to interact with others, to really stepping into what is a valued and compassionate response to a given situation. They learn to find balance and create win-win interactions rather than feeling like everything has to be a competition.

people waving arms in air

Being Authentic leads to more satisfaction in life. It’s a fact.

By now you may be asking, “it all sounds great Amy…. Where’s the risk”?

One of the things that often surprises us as we move into authenticity is how many of our closest relationship change. This is something that doesn’t get talked about nearly enough for my taste and I’m dragging the skeleton out of the closet right here and now!

When we change how we show up on the world, everything changes around us.

Let me repeat that so it sinks in….. When we change how we show up on the world, everything changes around us. This means that you will start to notice how friends and family feel different, or they start acting differently towards you. You might note that Aunt Becky used to drive you crazy with her frequent questions about your summer plans, and now? Well, now you tell her what you are doing or not doing and move along without another thought. Mom used to make you crazy with her requests for daily phone calls? Now, you find yourself super aware of her loneliness and you start calling her more often and having more meaningful conversations with you. And that older brother who you used to think was an ass? Well you may find he’s still an ass but now you are able to draw some boundaries that feel good to you and aren’t putting the burden on him to change.

Emotions Play a Part.

While all those are positive outcomes, sometimes the changes that we provoke in others can feel sad. There may be friends and family who you decide to let go out of your life for now, or forever. As you walk through the world in your full authenticity, it can allow you to see which people are supporting you and which ones are pulling you down as a requirement of being in relationship with them. Those are probably the ones you’ll be letting go of sooner or later.

Friendships Ebb and Flow.

It’s okay, it’s normal to have friendships change. Most of us are not still friends with our nursery school friends, in fact most of us don’t even remember them. Just because you are an adult doesn’t mean that your friendships won’t change and grow, wax and wane as you and your friends grow and change.

Let the relationships that support grow deeper by showing up for them fully and authentically. Let your heart shine up and out and you’ll inspire others around you to do the same. As you keep living into your heart’s truest desires- whatever it most wants to create in the world, you’ll connect more deeply with the people who support you, and many of the others will either fall away or you’ll decide you don’t want to spend time or effort on them any longer.

Letting go of relationships and recognising when others try to push your buttons is one of the true benefits of living your authenticity fully and freely. You’ll feel stronger and happier without actually doing much because you are BE-ing your SELF.

Dive Into Being Authentic!

So head on out. Embrace the world whether you live in New York, Michigan, Cali or Montreal. Wherever you are and whatever you are doing, be your authentic self and watch your world change!

And if you are looking to gain insight and support around your own journey into your power and authenticity, hit me with an email and let’s talk about how I can help you right now.

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